Conquered

"Continuous effort - not strength or intelligence - is the key to unlocking our potential." 

       --Liane Cordes

I'm still riding the high from running my first half marathon on Sunday I'm really still processing it in facts.

1:34.48.

30th overall, 12th female out of more than 10,000.

First in my age group.

But this picture seems to sum everything up.

This is me and my sister after the race. Yes, we look considerably more tired here than in the pre-race shots. But more important than all of the numbers and times is the fact that I got to share this moment with my sister. This was both of our first half marathons. This is my sister who decided back in middle school that she wasn't a "runner." But she set her mind to this race and trained for it and ran it! She conquered it.

The human body is amazing, but the will to reach our own potential is even more awe-inspiring. 

 

The Count Down to Tink

We're in the final stretch. In just two weeks, my sister and I will be lining up for the Tinker Bell Half Marathon at Disneyland. After my failed attempt at my last half marathon, this will be the first time I go at the 13.1 miles.

I have been trying not to dwell on the race or psych myself out. Every time I start thinking about getting in the corrals or what it's going to feel like at mile 9, I make myself think about something else. Focusing on the things that I cannot change before the race is not productive for me at this point. Instead, I am hydrating, keeping track of how I feel, and stretching A TON. I am trying to get myself as limber and loose as possible.

I'm also trying to stay positive about my training up to this moment and the fact that "it is only a race," as the boyfriend likes to point out to me. He's a runner, too, so it's not like he is trying to downplay what it takes to tackle a half marathon. He is instead telling me that there are tons of things out there harder than a race and that I need to keep a level head.

After countless cross country races and track meets in middle school and high school, my mind has a standard operating procedure going into big events like these. It tends to make my breath come quicker, my mouth taste weird and my stomach reject anything that I put into it. But it is just my brain and I have been trying to combat it by shifting attention when it tries to psych me out. Tackling your brain and mental capacity is something that many long distance runners deal with. When you're out there on your own for mile after mile, there's nothing to keep you company except for your brain. Using your brain as a positive power instead of letting it have control over you is key and sometimes very hard to do. Here's hoping that I've trained it well enough.

Today's Letters

Dear man sitting in the sun on the grass with your dogs: I like your style.  

Dear half-marathon training plan: Oh wait, you don't exist.  While I am a little worried that I don't have every single long run mapped out, I am motivated by the freedom.  

Dear Summer Olympics: While I love (love) you, you are totally screwing with my sleep schedule.  

Dear Mrs. Obama: Thank you for being so cool.  Hugging the USA basketball team and showing kids how awesome and important it is to be active? You rock. 

Dear Mr. Castillo: I am so stinkin' excited to go to San Diego with you this weekend! A trip, although just down the road, will allow us to sleep in and enjoy one another, without the distraction of the pup.  Here's to exploring the city and finding yummy food!

Well, Hello Again

Sometimes, you just have to take a break from it all.  Unplug.  Recharge.  Feel the grass between your toes before you can jump right back into the crazy.

Apparently that's what I've been doing lately.  But I think I'm getting back into the groove again.  I have a new roommate (hey, Lauren!), a handsome man by my side and a dog who loves to give kisses.  I am setting goals for myself and trying to stay away from the T.V. as much as possible (The Bachelorette aside, of course).  Here's the plan:

• Read during dinner instead of watching mindless crap.
• Jump on Rosetta Stone to learn Spanish at least 30 minutes every day.
• Exercise at least five days a week (did I mention that my sister and I are registered for the Tinker Bell Half Marathon in January?!).  Back in the saddle again.
• Write more, whether that's here on the blog, in my journal (encouraged by this couple) or for other outlets.
• Get back into Twitter.  It was inevitable ... no one can quit Twitter.
• Listen more.
• Be understanding and positive.

The summer is going brilliantly and hopefully making these things happen will add even more awesomeness to my life!  Have you guys ever taken a break to wind down and recharge?

Coming Back Stronger

It would be cliche to call it one of "those" runs. What I didn't know is that it would be painful. And revolutionary. And one of the most awesome and disappointing runs that I'd ever been on.

Here's how this all happened. On December 23, I went out for an eight-mile run. I had less than a month before my first half marathon. The run was perfection. I was on pace. I was moving like I'd never moved before. The last mile was clocked at just a tad over 7 minutes. I was stoked. That race was mine for the taking.

And then the pain. Top of the foot and unrelenting. A horrible ache that took over my consciousness.

Suffice it to say that the next day, walking was a chore. A painful chore.

It'll get better. I just need a little rest.

I thought those things over and over and over...

A week and a half later, it wasn't better and the rest was making me anxious. I had a half marathon to run in two weeks. Fifteen days to be pain-free and confident enough to run those 13 miles. The confidence was what I was really worried about. Training and endorphins can get you pretty far in a race, but your belief in yourself is what gets you across the finish line (call Hallmark, that's a winner).

So then, like anyone who is grieving, I started to negotiate.

If I don't run between now and the race but stay healthy and positive, I can do this.

I thought those things over and over and over...

I had to pull the plug.  I couldn't run my first half marathon injured. And man, was I injured. Physically, mentally and emotionally. Drained and hurting.

Somehow it was easy to tell people that I wasn't running the race. Injury, especially when people had seen me hobbling around, was a perfect out. I felt a weird sense of relief that I wasn't running the race. The pressure was gone. The worry about whether I was going to run in pain was gone. It as a little scary how ok I was with not running.

And then the real need-endorphins-must-take-charge-of-everything part of me kicked in. I couldn't be sitting around, wallowing in the story that "I was injured and just needed some rest". That wasn't the person I wanted to be. I was better than that injured person that I had become so easily and freely.

I made a doctor's appointment at one of the top sports medicine clinics in the South Bay. I got sweet x-rays of my feet. Unfortunately, nothing showed up on them. No definitive diagnosis other than overuse came from that doctor and a script for physical therapy and anti-inflammatories were the only things I had when I walked out the door.

Turns out, the physical therapy was much better than the pills.

After some poking, prodding, stretching, testing and videotaping, the physical therapist deduced that my upper thighs and groin area were SO tight that they were affecting the way I was walking. Yup, I was told I was walking funny because the tightness was inhibiting my body from performing the way it was naturally supposed to.

It's been about three weeks since that realization. I've been doing my stretching exercises religiously and staying positive about my recovery. These are the small things that are going to change me and get me back on the right track.

I go back today for another physical therapy appointment. I'm hoping this one is the one where he says, "You are ready."

Ready for the pavement.

Ready for the early mornings again.

Ready for the feelings that I had that day in late December.

Minus the pain.

Thoughts of Today

1. Between this blog, Facebook, Twitter and Pinterest, my journal has been sadly neglected lately.  I haven't written much of anything in it beyond my Christmas shopping list.  Although I like having a hard-copy documentation of my life, I am oddly ok with it being empty as of late.  It means that my life is good and busy and I'm not afraid to tell the world what is going on.  One of my earlier relationships ate up a lot of my journal space because I wasn't necessarily sure of where things were going (and didn't want to share my hesitations).  But this new, fantastic, heart-filling relationship has got me shouting lovelys from the rooftop (and this blog).

2. I've failed two three days in a row in getting up early to go run.  Two Three days!  I did a long 10-mile run on Saturday that was really, really satisfying.  Each mile after the first one were under 8 min. (and hovered right around 7:30), so I was really happy with that.  But since then, when that alarm goes off at 5 am, I have ignored it.  Why?  Shouldn't the fear of the looming half-marathon be enough to jolt me out of my sweet, warm hibernation?  Apparently not.

3. My mom sent me this photo earlier in the day.  Oh, how homesick it made me.  I want to feel the snow crunch gently under my boots and see the pawprints of little animals in the snow around the ditches.  I want my nose to turn red when I go outside because it is nippy.  I want to wear a jacket, scarf and hat because I have to, not because it is fashionable.

4. I didn't put up a Christmas tree this year for a few reasons.  First, Austin.  Enough said.  Secondly, it seemed kind of like a big hassle for only a few weeks.  But because of this, please see No. 3...that is how I feel when I get back to the apartment and there aren't any twinkling lights to greet me.

5. One day, I'll slowly dance around my dimly-lit living room with my sweethear to Nat King Cole's version of "The Christmas Song."  The tree will be twinkling, casting soft shadows on the walls.  And it will be perfect.

6. I can't believe that the half marathon is in one month + one day.  I am neither excited nor scared.  At this point, I am just focused on getting in a few more long runs between now and then.  Scheduling them in-between parties, heels, brunches, packing, wrapping, Christmas and New Years is a job unto itself. 

7. Our company is moving to Hermosa Beach two days after the half marathon.  I am so excited for this move because the new building is about 1.5 miles from my house.  I can ride my bike to work everyday!  You know how much money I am going to save on gas?!  Oh, yeah, and I guess save the environment, too.

H2O

I am pretty good at staying hydrated.  As evidenced by about ten water bottles in my house, I am not afraid to guzzle or chug or gulp down the good stuff.

But with the half marathon around the corner, I want to do my best to drink as much water as I can during the day to fight off the random headaches and sleepy feelings one gets when not drinking enough.  Especially on the mornings I run,  I get distracted by tea and coffee at work when I should be drinking water.

My friend had sent me this spiffy water bottle for my birthday a few months ago. When I first saw it, I was skeptical.  Wouldn't you be?  It looks funny.

This is the Hydracoach bottle.  It has a timer in the bottle and also tracks how much water you drink in any given time.  When this photo was taken, I had swallowed 60 oz. of water in almost 7 hours.  Initially, I thought to myself, "Why do I need a bottle to tell me how much I'm drinking? As long as I continue to fill a bottle up, I should be good."  But like I said before, with the big race coming up, I wanted to actually make myself drink water.

And what better way to do that then with a bottle that is staring back at you...counting up the seconds...almost warning you that you're not drinking enough.  It shows your average oz./hour consumption and I hate to see it start dropping...gotta keep the numbers up!

I'm going to try to use this water bottle exclusively for the next month to really stay on top of being hydrated.  Hopefully I become motivated by actually seeing my daily water consumption.

P.S. More bathroom trips are in my future.

To You, I Ask

Questions that I ask in preparation for the half marathon:

1. What am I going to wear?

2. What am I going to eat before the race?

3. What am I going to eat the week before the race?

4. At what mileage should I peak?

5.  How long does my longest long run before the race need to be?

6. Is it going to hurt?

7. Ok, duh, it's going to hurt, but will I be able to push through?

8. Am I crazy?

9. I'm crazy.  I'm crazy.  Can I get out of this somehow?

10. Calm down.  There's no question here, just some deep breathing.

11. Are my feet going to be able to handle 13.1 miles?

12. Do I need to start working out my arms more to handle the pumping of that distance?

13. Can I sleep the whole Saturday before the race?

14. Can I sleep the whole week after the race?

15.  Can I sleep right now?

16. Do I need to watch what I eat during the holidays in preparation for the race?

17. Does that mean I can't have Christmas cookies?

18. What about egg nog?  It's healthy, right?

19. What's the weather going to be like?

20. What am I going to wear (part two)?

21. What if it rains?

22. How much is this race going to rock? 

Here We Go

Taking deep breaths...

Just registered for the 13.1® Los Angeles half marathon. 

Wow.  This is now real.  I have no choice but to train.  I can't back out.

I'm pretty sure the Rocky song will be replayed many times between now and then to pump myself up.

Big Confidence Boost

Source

Things have been a little crazy lately...spending time with the boy...visiting friends...dog sitting (walking three dogs at a time can be complicated)...staying out of the rain...learning...getting ready for Thanksgiving...Christmas-gift shopping...

But you know what happened on Sunday?  I went for an 8 mile run and I felt A-to-the-MAZING!  That was the longest run I've done in a really, really long time.  I got caught in a short downpour that made things interesting, but overall, my body was diggin' the run and working smoothly.  My overall time was good and I can't wait to hook my Garmin watch up to the computer to see my splits.

This was a huge confidence boost for me in my hopes to do a half marathon in mid-January.  I think in the next few days I am going to put together a more concrete training schedule so I make sure to build up to 10, 11 or even 12 miles before the race. 

Knowing that all of the major holidays are in between now and the half-marathon is a little daunting.  But when I worry or am unsure, I am going to think back to Sunday's run.  Because there's almost nothing better than knowing you knocked out 8 miles (and felt strong doing it) before most people had their first cup of coffee!

Am I Crazy?

Source

13.1® Los Angeles.

Jan. 15, 2012.

Two months from today.

Do I have time to train?

Will my body let me train?

Am I crazy to train?

I'm excited.

I'm apprehensive.

I'm scared out of my mind.

But after morning run...I'm feeling confident.

A few more days to sleep on it before I register.

It's now or never, right?